Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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