I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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