Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize