fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
