My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
