to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
