I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
