They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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