You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
