wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize