We named our party play list daddy issues
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
