dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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