my phone needs a breathalizer
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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