so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
