There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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