the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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