Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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