we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
