I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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