Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Someone came in the potted fern
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize
