great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
