As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
