There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
How does it feel to date your dad?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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