It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
