this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
You took a bar mat shot.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
