We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
