Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
