I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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