It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
