scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
whose ass print is on the piano?
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You have to summon your inner elephant
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
