I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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