I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
