The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
