I am puke
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
