We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
