I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
