thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
