Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
should my penis look like a turkey
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
