please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Buhtt sex?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
