she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
