i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
