Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
