end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
This is my gift to your gina
Naked. naked and bneed help.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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