I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
