he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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