She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
