for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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