ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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