I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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