This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
